My boyfriend is worried of dying a...

[School Rocks]

...premature death form heart failure? My serious boyfriend has a poor heart health in the male side of his family. His grandpa, father, and I think Uncle have had heart trouble. His dad actually died of a heart attack when he was 35 years old and his father was healthy, apparently. My boyfriend is convinced he will die when he is 40 or something like that. He has never even seen a cardiologist about this. He is making these dramatic conclusions based souley on a prediction due to his family. My boyfriend is a very healthy athlete who eats well. I feel he has no worries. I do not know ow he feels considering he lost his father. He also really desire to be a good father and a father that his son knows, meaning I would have to have a child hypothetically with him when I am 25, which is a lot of pressure on me, and I am in college and not really planning that far. I dream about it, but not totally concrete. Its too much and too scary right now to even contemplate. How should I feel toward this? How should he be thinking?

[bilbobagsend]

okay the more he worries the more you worry tell him he is well of compared with people around you there are people with cancer etc all needy people so tell him he is lucky to have you and your time is NOW

[ursula k]

Get a check up from the doctor.I had the same phobia when my mum died but a doctor and counselling helped me through it.

[Bart S]

He should keep on top of the latest research and advice from organizations such as the American Heart Foundation and book in for a full cardio check up at his local health center. It's the only way to put someone's mind at rest.

[Dave124]

He needs to find out exactly what problems his family has faced. There are many different kinds of heart problems. He simply needs to go to a doctor and explain his family history and fears. There may be nothing to fear but fear itself. Maybe the other men in his family had a genetic heart disfigurement but he doesn't have it. Have him go see a doctor ASAP. If he does have a genetic issue, maybe there is something they can do to help him. Without seeing a doctor, he might just worry himself to death. Good Luck.

[RoxyChic]

My Boyfriend actually also has a bad family line of heart disease. His father died before age 40 of heart failure and of course it does cross his mind from time to time, but as long as he keeps his health up by eating right and staying healthy. I wouldnt worry too much. I suggest maybe you guys going to a cardiologist together and getting a health scan. Maybe that would lessen his worries. There's things that may happen in the future that you can and can't prevent but you just have to live day by day and not worry your life away.

[Omar P]

Well, he should not worry too much about the matter. Every person is different. If what you say is true, that he eats well, then that is some kind of protection for him. Advice him to eat vegetables and fruits and lower the intake of meat. I think he is really serious too you. However, if you really have dreams for yourself, tell him what you feel. As for how he should think, he should not always worry about the matter. Everyone is liable to worry but if he really loves you, then he should share every moment he has with you.

[never u]

tell him worrying actually makes his heart weaker(it does,stress wise) he should go get a stress test done, if he is athetic he probably has nothing at all to worry about , BUT, he sounds like hes got some mental problem and you should move on without him, his obsession will ultimately take on other forms, probably alcohol abuse, maybe drugs, he will self diagnose and then your life will be a hell on earth, get away now before its to late!!

[mystique]

He should get a thorough exam by an internal medicine doctor. When filling in the paperwork for a new doctor or often updating information for a visit they will ask family history so the more he knows the better. There are other cardiac (genetic) problems that can mimic a heart attack so maybe he should look into some of those or even consider genetic testing for mutations.Knowledge is power and gives you options to better (lengthen) life.

[orangebelt]

Since you claimed that your boyfriend is an athlete and eats healthily advise him to avoid emotional stress.. it can be due to financial insecurity, etc..

People with stable relationship generally enjoys healthy life.. perhaps both of you should consider bringing your relationship to the next stage.. :).. and enjoy a good life together..