Fiance's daughter moves in with two children....

[lrpharm54]

...Daughter is stressed and can't manage children. Boys 8 and 12 Recently, My fiance's daughter in her 30s moved in with her two children. The daughter uses profanity constantly and yells at her boys constantly. The older child hits the smaller child on a constant basis and is disruptive and is not disciplined. The father of one of the children is in prison for drug use and sales. The other father is not responsive to wanting the older child to move in with him. They are not my relatives yet, and it is getting on my nerves. I am not responsible for them, but my fiance felt it was necessary to "rescue" them. Now she regrets their presence because it has disrupted our quiet existance. They are annoying, we don't really have the room for them, and they are eating us out of house and home. I don't see where it is my place to discipline the boys and the daughter seems to not have control and gets upset and violent over the slightest thing. She played a video called Borat, and the content was very inappropriate for the boys to watch. Any suggestions?

[Happily ♥ Engaged]

♥ Get them out of the house. My family went through a similar situation. My mom took in her little sister [[only by a couple of years]], her boyfriend, and her two boys [[age 11 and 15 almost 16]]. My mom is on disability because she has had over 21 knee and ankle surgeries, but because she wasn't getting paid because of wutever reason she had to go back to work. She was working all night at a Hotel when her sister moved in. When they moved in things got BAD! They ate her out of house & home, they broke windows & all her collectible figuriens, they left dirty clothes, tissues & dishes everywhere, they'd run the AC with the windows & door wide open, the did drugs in the house, etc. My mom tried to deal with it but after them ruining so many things & not letting her sleep during the day she asked them to leave. She asked numerous times, finally she had to go up to the court and get a paper notorized saying that they had such & such amount of days to get out. They are no longer living there and things are so much better for her! If I were you I'd get that paper and have them leave. Good Luck!PS~ I know this is your fiance's family, but they have to want the help. And if they appreciated it she would get ahold of her boys and help out with things.

[R T]

If your fiance is okay with this situation , get out of there. You do not need this situation. Is this your house or her's? sounds like you are being used by both women. 1 suit case is okay a steamer trunk and 2 back packs is a bit too much. Before it is to late get daughter out or look for another fiance

[Pequen]

What? You don't feel like is your place to discipline? Aren't they in YOUR house? Anybody that comes to live with you have to abide by your rules sir. Whether they like it or not. If she doesn't like it then tell her to hit the road. Obviously she sounds inmature and I feel sorry for those kids. But if you want peace in your house you need to take care of business.

[mrskerlin]

A parent should always provide consequences for actions they don't want repeated. So even though your "step-daughter" is 30 she needs to have consequences. We are good about laying down the law at our house. You will do this or this is acceptable and this is not acceptable. If you want to stay in our house or eat our food then these are the things that are expected of you, if you don't do them then these are the consequences. I would definately try to get your fiancee to put some rules and expectations in place and have some real consequences or they could be out of control and there forever.